Plastic Dragon

Once upon a time in Chicago there lived a young knave, and this knave was the dorkiest in all the land. Nary a maiden spared him a look, and none of the other knaves let him ride with them at recess.
One mundane afternoon, the knave was playing his Xbox, as was custom for lonely adolescents, when he was cyber-accosted by the Microsoft paperclip, smiling gaily and frolicking as only paperclips can.
“It looks like you’ve found a secret entrance. Would you like me to A.) assist you in your travels, or B.) @$%! off?
The knave was puzzled, but his loneliness was such that he was grateful even for this company, so he selected A.
“Congratulations! Your pathetic life has led you to choose correctly – those who choose so are granted one wish. Please type your desire into the textbox below.”
His ego rather wounded, the knave expressed his wish to force his comrades to forgo ignoring him further.
“Be warned! If you cause more destruction than good, your prior misery will be increased tenfold!”
The knave found himself transformed into a monstrous magenta dragon, but he heeded the paperclip’s warning. So he struck out to impress upon the Chicago-ites his power – provided he did not break anything.
Unfortunately, he found it difficult to be cautious and terrifying. He discovered that the townspeople laughed at a dragon looking both ways and ducking under streetlights. With tears of rage streaming down his scaly face, he roared as he was surrounded by the mob of mocking Chicago-ites laughing at the dragon who was meek. He raised a gargantuan foot, and as he made to crush his tormentors, he disappeared. The circle of people was perplexed, but from the sky fell a tiny plastic dragon-knave, its mouth open in silent fury.
One old woman moved from the crowd, and she pocketed the toy. It is said that she invites obnoxious children to play with it, and that those children are never seen again unless meekly clinging to their mothers’ skirts, all notions of misbehavior abandoned.