We only saw Pete once after that. It wasn't planned; I ran into Michael at the mall. We were buying for our ladies, you know, those half-off Valentines racks. We'd've invited Wendolyn, but she was home with a headache, and it's not a place for women, anyway. Not a place for us either, I guess.
Neverland hadn't changed, but those places don't. The people change names is all--same mindless beat, nervous first-timers, the twinks and gym junkies. I used to be pressed against those bodies; now it felt weird, like I was a pervert watching someone undressing through a window.
Pete was standing in our old spot, squeezed into a shirt I remembered from freshman year. His eyes lit up when he saw us…as much as they could, anyway, with the burst vessels.
"You guys decided to stop actin' like you got one foot in the grave?"
We listened to the stories of his conquests, laughed though they seemed even less likely to be true now than before. It should have been like old times, but wasn't. Michael and I were in work clothes, and Pete's stories were interrupted by spasms of coughing.
"How's your lover?" Pete asked. I shrugged.
"Val? Fine. She's been--"
"I was talkin' about Tom."
"Thomas..." I paused, surprised by the knot in my throat. It seemed forever since I'd said his name. "He's not doing too great. His--his count--"
"I don't wanna talk about that. I mean, how's his career? Still slingin'?"
"You gotta stop that stuff, Pete. It'll kill you faster."
"I’m not dyin' no time soon," Pete said. "And Tom'll pull out. Always does. Ain't we still young?"
The lights flashed over his bruises, ambulance alarms, and I remembered I needed to get Val's chocolates home before they melted.
"Am I Young Yet?" immediately brought to mind visions of Peter Pan. I played with the idea a few different ways, but this one felt most authentic. I do, however, wish I'd been able to play with it more to fit it more to the line than to "Am I STILL Young?".
ReplyDeleteGreat piece, Tamara. Love the use of Neverland here and the reference to twinks. I'm not sure what Neverland is, though I'm also not sure I mind not beign clear. Is it the mall? Or a place in the mall? The reference to pressing against bodies is intriguing and sets us up for the uncertain sexuality of the rest of the piece. That's all nicely handled. That said, I think after all, we could use a description of one or two other characters, denizens of Neverland, to build a stronger sense of the place's seediness. And, actually, I'd almost like to feel a little longing, too, that there's something attractive about it, as well. The bruises as ambulance alarms is a nice touch, effective, where the pervert line, while apt, perhaps, has less punch, maybe because it's more obvious an image than the alarms, which benefits from being a surprising, but also apt, comparison. I'd cut the line, "Ain't we still young?" as it is a bit too direct, too on point, cutting off the more trusting, evocative mood of the piece--interpreting, that is, rather than suggesting.
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