It's the compounding of noises that could drive you insane. Dronings of white noise, catching only a smidgen. Nature... only.. respond.... apathia. Whirring like a symphony, up and down, up and down. Like cicadas, or a siren. Like a jet ski engine, bucking, kicking, dulling the mind. And the clicking, incessant clicking. The bubbling of a coffee maker but not so pleasant--sputtering, spitting, forceful. It's more of a gnashing, mastication, Morse code. Looking gets you nowhere. Tainted white on almost clear. Flashes of pink on either side. Enamel on keratin. Some people twirl their hair, locks curling around slender fingers. At least that's silent. Not like bees or mosquitoes or flies. Always around, always unwanted. That's what it is, you know--unwanted. It could drive you insane. It could make you kill someone.
For this piece, I tried to focus on the descriptions more than the actual act I was describing. I let things flow, just from one thought to the next. Still, I tried to stick with a narrative type form, not wandering all over the place but sticking to a scene.
ReplyDeleteNice work. I'm not really feeling the scene, but that doesn't matter here. I like what you've done with the descriptions themselves. Sometimes, as with the symphony, the simile doesn't seem quite apt, given the mechanical qualities you're attributing to the thing you're describing, but other comparisons really work, like the jet ski. not sure I quite get what you're describing, if it's one person's habits or several--seems like it could be either at different points--but the idea really works.
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